really bad puns

By the title of this, you know what this is about.

BAD PUNS FROM ME, TUMBLR ( mostly ), AND A POPTART COMMERCIAL ( pickup line included ).

- how do japanese chihuahuas say hello?

konnichihuahua

- dang girl are you my appendix because I don't understand how you work but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out

- do you think if tumblr opened up a café it would be called yumblr

- what's it called when you shoot someone on Halloween
  
trigger treating

    no its called homicide

        trigger treating

- recent studies show that if lightning is unhappy with conditions at work it goes on strike

- my friend was cold so I told her to stand in the corner

corners are 90 degrees

- what kind of shoes do thieves wear?

sneakers

- when a cop yells "freeze" you can yell back "now everybody clap yo hands" and he is required by law to start clapping or else he will be arrested for treason and possibly deported from the country. ( not a pun but I find this funny )

- can you believe one direction's bones are taking a break before them

- so today this guy this accidentally hit me with the door when he was walking out of a classroom and instead of saying sorry he looked me over and said "pretty cute" and walked away. And then I realized, I literally just got hit on. The pun is greater than the pain.

- are you a child of Apollo cuz you light up my world like nobody else
are you a child of Aphrodite because the way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed
are you a child of Demeter cuz when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell
are you Percy Jackson cuz you don't know you're beautiful.

- what did the ghost teacher say to the class?
look at the board and I will go through it again

- telekinesis is not a HANDy skill.

wow these are so punny I'm dying.

Okay as you can tell I am very lame because I LOVE PUNS.